Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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