yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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