did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
