sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
