Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Randomize
