I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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