ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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