things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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