i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
