LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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