Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
