i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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