I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
