Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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