return my video game
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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