Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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