I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
