The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
