he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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