is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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