1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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