they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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