You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
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