Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize