Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
