kristin has been a bad kristin
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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