Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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