I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
