that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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