Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize