i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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