They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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