So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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