Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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