they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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