I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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