Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
