I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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