No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
