I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
that may or may not have been my penis.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
