Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Are my feet made of real feet?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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