At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
im six kinds of drunk right now
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Randomize
