you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Holy sore nipples Batman
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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