Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
They took my balls.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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