Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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