never play flip cup with pint glasses
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Randomize
