gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
