I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize