I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Randomize
