how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
