dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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