I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
